Interview with a Romantic…

Interview with a Romantic

Jamie (Host): Good evening Ladies & Gentlemen, it’s a lovely scene here at Pink FM 102.7 and we have with us tonight a very special Guest,  he’s very well known in his ways of explaining what most people fail sometimes to express and we managed recently to secure an interview with him to talk with us about the topic that dazzles most of us… Falling in LOVE Again!  Adam, welcome to Pink FM, it’s great to have you with us.

Adam: Thank you Jamie, it’s good to be here Smile

Jamie (Host): So Adam, when we talk about Falling in Love AGAIN, that poses great questions to most of us.. Can someone Fall in Love more than once? and if that’s possible, does that mean that the first time was fake? and the latter one is the real thing?

Adam: Actually Jamie falling in love with someone was never about the other person, it has been and will always be about you… I heard it from a girl once, that you love the other person as much as you Love yourself when you are with them. which I believe is the closest to reality as possible.

So Falling in Love with someone has a lot to do with YOU than it is about that person…

Jamie (Host): Excuse me for interrupting Adam, so are you saying that the other person is irrelevant in the love game? and it’s all about us? because that seems very awkward to me

Adam: No, I never said that the other person is irrelevant, I just wanted to highlight the importance of YOU first, because most people always think it in opposite directions, so they put lots of pressure of their counter part, while they don’t realize that things has to start with them.

Think of your Happiness as being locked in a Box with a Very Sophisticated Lock Combination that periodically changes, so not just anyone can open it to release your locked happiness, but every time that happiness is unleashed  a newer, bigger  & better version grows back into the same box, that needs to be unlocked.

the-da-vinci-code-cryptex-21358703

Jamie (Host): Wow, that’s a special way to describe it… But what you’re saying is that it’s a very hard job to keep trying and unlocking over and over… That’s Difficult and non-sustainable!!

Adam: Not quite so… you see the combination to that lock is programmed by YOU, your expectations, your views, your dreams, your desires… That’s why it constantly changes; But sometimes you find someone who just say the passcode to your Box without issues, and unlock your happiness… so you start by liking them… then with every unlocking, your love to them grows… but at one point (and that happens with lots of us)… it becomes more and more difficult to unlock the box… and Happiness  expires and the solution is locked with a very powerful combination.. And that causes Love to fade, and passion to start vanishing and break ups to take place.

Jamie (Host): so as I understand from you, that we tie our inner happiness with our Love to the other person but it’s not a one-time thing, it has to be renewed constantly in order for us to sustain that love & happiness.

Adam: Precisely!

Jamie (Host): so Getting the Girl, is just the first step into the 1000 miles journey Confused smile
Adam: Well think about it as, every step is a Journey of itself Smile

Jamie (Host): but Adam, I’m not trying to be pessimistic here, but that sounds like hard work!!

Adam: NOT AT ALL!
Jamie (Host): Huh??

Adam: you see the RIGHT person, is someone who would have the personality, the character, the lifestyle, the EVERYTHING that would naturally produce pass-codes to the Happiness Box of the other person. And he/she would be doing that effortlessly, and with every day, week, month, year the relationship grows, that person will grow more and more into what’s the Lifecycle of Water… Where Sea water just get vaporized into cloud then fall down as rain and go out from the ground as river flow to go back to the sea.

Jamie (Host): That’s Beautiful! so Being with the right person, is what makes every relationship easy?

Adam: Indeed. But since we’re the combination of all the experiences and past life, it’s possible that we might meet “More than one Right Person” at some stages of our life. But there will be a certain time (when we normally say, we’ve matured enough) that the Right person will be very hard to find, but once you do… it’s Worth the Wait Smile!

Jamie (Host): Thank you Adam for this lovely analogy, one last question to you, taking advantage from your appearance with us in Pink FM… How would you DESCRIBE, in your own words, Falling in Love Again!

Adam: (sight Embarrassed smile)

When you’re in Love, everything looks beautiful, and nothing seems impossible… Everyone starts smiling at you… The Music and the Rhythms suddenly find a way into your veins… Every story, Every Song, Every movie is now written after your loved one and Starring YOU… You Wake up Smiling, you Fall asleep smiling and your eyes Glows when you are walking, You get so excited and you can’t hide it…  It’s just a Priceless Feeling that makes your life Worth Living, because you know that it’s Now it’s TRUE.

Jamie (Host): Thank you Adam for your time, it was our pleasure having you with us; Ok Ladies and Gentlemen we leave you with this special song that Adam picked specially for you , it’s Covered by Boyce Avenue and it’s called Just the Way you Are… which simply summarize his main point Smile.

******************************

Cheers,
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Partnerships in FOCUS

 

This topic may differ based on the culture differences but we all agree on the importance of its proper definition and frame.

in the WLB Book, a chapter is dedicated on the different types of Relationships and Engagements.. But in this post, I’m going to focus on only one sub-topic which is the “Partnership” and more precisely 3 aspects of it only:

  • Decisions
  • Benefits
  • Liabilities

Partnership

Partnerships in Business

HandShake

Let’s take for example that you were to be a partner in a company or a venture, The 3 elements would look like this:

  1. D: you have Power over the overall Decisions based on how much influential you hold legally in that company, (If you hold the Majority of Shares, then you have, LEGALLY, power of all its decisions… if not, your Power become less and less influential, not LESS Important… Just Less influential when things go wrong.)
  2. B: at the end of the Year / Quarter /… (depending  on how the company’s financial plans go) you get Benefits (profits / etc…) also by how much you have shares in the company. So you guessed it, the more shares you hold, the more your share of the profits is.
  3. L: Partnerships in the Corporate Business is always tight to a simple concept, you cannot win if you are un-liable when you Lose. which means in simple terms, if you’re not liable when the company is losing or in difficult times (even if it’s strictly your own money) then chances are slim of you ripping benefits from the company as a partner (Legally Speaking)

 

Partnerships in Life

free-relationship_advice

Although partnerships in Life can follow the same rules, only the rules of engagement are different, you see most Life Partnerships “JUST HAPPEN” and it’s most probably NOT Tight to Formal Agreements but more based on “Understandings”.

And depending on  the level of the relationship (Casual dating all the way to engagement and marriage), this “Partnership” evolves progressively from simple things to more complex “You-Can-Bet-Your-Life-on” decisions.

But during our research about this topic, we found out, that (Despite the Movies you might have seen and the stories you heard) most couples have difficulties defining the 3 elements of relationships.

Now I’m sure that when you reach to this part of the Article, you will start putting the hat of FURY… So Hold you breath and read through the end of this post Smile.

  • It doesn’t matter who’s the “Boss” in the relationship, there always should be a Decision-Maker or a Higher Authority in the relationship; 6 out of 9 women we interviewed disagreed and said that it depends on the topic and that some decisions can be solely by either the man or the woman; On the other hand 8 of 9 men agreed as long as the MAN is the Boss in the relationship… (Yes Men will always be Men Winking smile)

But Unlike in the business world where Partnerships are built to drive & grow a company (or mission / purpose…) and where the benefits are directed towards the shareholders / partners Personally & Individually. Life Partnerships are always built for the same purpose but without the perception of the individual gain. 

Having said the above, The concept of Benefit & Liability is more likely to be TAKEN for granted between couples because there’s no Guide / Manual / Cheat-Sheet for what are these in a relationship!!

So Couples are more over-whelmed by the PERCEPTION of what they are getting from the B & L rather than the actual Value and they would be more concerned by “Who’s the Boss”.

Just to Close on this point, You Always NEED A BOSS in a relationship, and the answer to the ones that think that there should be a SITUATIONAL BOSS is as simple as this… A BOSS or a Higher Authority in any entity, does not require him/her to CONSTENTLY interfering in the details and giving orders left & right, in fact the Middle-Manager can have more value in taking decisions… But when things go WRONG… it always has to end up with the person who has the most … L.iability

The “Right” Ratio

Decisions, Benefits & Liability are all tight and dictated by the Percentages (%) partners hold.

(PS: a Partner can also NOT be an actual Employee in the Company, so even a Major Shareholder in a Company might not be the actual CEO)

The explanation in the Business World is more of obvious… so I’ll focus on the Life Partnerships for now

So let’s say that in real-life, a couple decided on the below percentages / partnerships (10%-90%)

Life Partnership 10-90

So the decision maker is the MAN (in this example), and is ripping most of the benefits (Prioritizing the relationship based on his dreams, career, etc…) and taking the decisions accordingly.

The Problem goes in the Following… When things go wrong in the Relationship… Most MEN Get the Liability part as being calculated differently (and selfishly too), so it has to be Split equally Smile  if he was the responsible or blamed more on his partner if it was actually her fault.

mmmmmmmmm….. That’s Sad but it’s True, and depending on how strong the personality of the partner, she can either suffer in silence, FIGHT BACK (Oh Yeah, Women are good in that Smile with tongue out), or Try to re-negotiate their “understanding” which sometimes lead to un-happy endings.

Now how we found the answer to that (for those who actually reach this part of the article and still are curious enough Winking smile).

Life Partnership,  has to follow ALL the aspects of the Business Partnership

Life Partnership 49-51

So in the end, despite what you have implicitly agreed on, always remember the 3 elements of partnerships and Honor all 3 accordingly,  and trust me you’ll find Love everywhere you go in your relationship… Because then you’ll be living the way you want and giving away voluntarily what you have when you want and for whatever long you decide to.

And remember, Love was made for You & Your Partner Smile.

 

Love was made for YOU and ME!

 

Cheers,
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What happens when you don’t get on Facebook for a Week?

 

Facebook men vs_ women

Well it depends if you’re a Male or a Female Smile,

Cheers,
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Who’s the Boss? (Man vs Woman Entrepreneur)

 

This chapter took the most of my researches, I’ve read almost every book that has been written on the subject, and checked literally 1000s of articles in over 6 years and I must confess this subject still amazes me and I can’t say that I have even “Enough” information to survive with….

Power struggle

 

The Cream of my research goes down to the conclusion that Everyone of us needs to Really learn more about the subject of the differences between Men and Women because at least 50% of things that used to Bother you in your domestic Partner or Business Partner would start to make sense… 

 

woman-disciplining-man

 

Not only that, but by learning about the differences, you will learn More about your self than you ever thought you knew.

 

 

 

 

In the course of the book, you will check from the humor of the events and the characters talking about the many aspects of the differences from the Personal level and from the Professional level, but here, I’m only going to include the main differences between Men & Women Entrepreneurs, 

 

Women Entrepreneurs

Compared to most men entering business, most women are:

femalebosslady122007

 

  • Hard Working
  • More careful
  • More accurate
  • More serious
  • More enquiring
  • More likely to seek and listen to advice
  • Quieter and less flamboyant
  • Less inclined to push themselves forward
  • Better at dealing with people
  • More likely to worry
  • More likely to underestimate themselves
  • More likely to blame themselves when things go wrong

 

This list generalizes, and people vary, but on the whole I believe it to be true.

 

 

Lacking Confidence, women tend to do more research and seek advice more readily. Being worriers they will think round a situation before committing themselves. Consequently they tend to set their firms up on good foundations.

They also tend to keep records and to be good at dealing with customers, suppliers and staff.

Male Entrepreneurs

Although the gap is closing, men still start more companies than women. In comparison, their firms tend to:

mad-men-jon-hamm-photo

  • Grow Faster
  • Get Bigger
  • Be more ambitious
  • Be technically based
  • Be faster-moving
  • Be better at self-promotion
  • Have trouble keeping staff
  • Go bust more frequently
  • Have more crises on the way.

The sheer fact of numbers means that male-run firms continue, for the moment, to be the backbone of the small business movement. At the time when some aspects of masculinity are under attach, it may help to know that we chaps can claim to be useful in one field at least.

More seriously, any man starting in business would do well to pause in the headlong rush to get going and pounder the comments above on his female counterpart. A more thoughtful approach can pay off, handsomely Smile.

 

Hope you enjoyed this Teaser….

in the Actual Book, Adam (The Main Character) learn more about himself, while analyzing the differences between his Girlfriend and his Boss..

Cheers,
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Whatever Happened to the… Other Guy?

Hey,

I’ve started the last phase of my Book, Which is the Proof of Concepts… and during which I’m laying a Solid Foundation of Psychology behind the revolutionary “Work Love Balance”.

I’ve researched and looked through 100s of Books, dozens of Movies and 1000s of articles during the past 5 years while writing.. there were several topics that grabbed my attention, several ones that blew me up of my feet and few ones that DAZZLED me… and here’s one of them..

I’m sure most of the readers here would be more likely to have watched the movies than read the actual books.. so I’m going to make my examples from even more popular and general Movies… (although I believe that reading the book is a totally different experience than watching the movie… a good example is the famous “He’s not that into You” Movie vs Book… if you read the book you’ll know exactly what I mean)

Ok I don’t know what to call it yet… but for now, I’m going to call it… The OTHER Person Phenomena (it applies to Guys as well as Girls)… The person who happened to be at with the wrong place at the right time… With the wrong person at the right time… or simply at the right place at the wrong time…

When you’re watching a Romantic Movie, or simply a romantic story within a movie – especially if it’s a  good movie – you get somehow connected to the roles the actors are playing.. and you get so attached to the story while you’re watching that you feel that you sometimes need to yell at the Girl saying “Get back to him you fool…” or at the Guy “Tell her you Love her you Moron…” ; I mean haven’t this happened to lots of you movies fans?

And while we all strive for the “Right Things” in the Love Story… We miss that “Things are already Right”…  and I’m talking about a classic story of a girl loves a guy, a guy loves a girl .. they broke up for some reason… years later they meet while each of them is with another person… then the story goes on from one scene to the other and at the end They get back together… and everybody’s happy …. you wipe some happy tears and when the lights are up.. you go home dreaming how this love story was an astonishing one…

Well HOLD ON… Everybody’s Happy??  … HELL NO!! What about the OTHER PERSON???

Sweet Home Alabama

I guess the best movie you should watch to know what I mean would be … Sweet Home Alabama..

or maybe Spiderman 2 Smile with tongue out

1187023584427_DF-10024_DF-10004R3_jpg_147_106

or if if you’re into Arabic Movies…. watch “3an el 3ishq wal Hawa”

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Well 1/3 (being pessimistic cause it’s much more than that) of the movies I’ve seen has the Other Person Phenomena in them… and to be honest, they vanish from the story at the end.. Smile

So the Phenomena is very simple… The Other Person is the person who (most of the times) is the loving, caring, and exceptionally great type, that did everything as he should’ve had… and at the end DIDN’T GET THE GIRL Smile

And what really dazzles me is that people are OK with that!!!  and they even Clap when she Run-Away from her Wedding-with-that-Amazing “Other Person” Whose  Dreams and Love Life  gets crushed before his eyes… to be with her Old Love.. because that is the “Right Thing to Do”…

The dilemma with the “Doing Right Things” and “Doing Things Right” have a whole different meaning in the Corporate World.. and I go there deeply in my Book… and guess what… There’s a HUGE Similarity in both Contexts… but I Guess you need to wait for my Book to Read more about it Winking smile

Cheers,

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This is NOT the actual Intro of the Book…

Today we are confronted with situations and circumstances that our ancestors never encountered.. The way people live their lives today is overwhelming to those who experienced it in the 60s or 70s; The Age of the ease of access to information and technologies is simply fascinating…

We can now alternate our fertility with hormones, have artificial insemination; we can change & improve our appearance with cosmetics or surgeries and we can create a new life ourselves; we can meet new partners through many ways and the internet is a major player in that domain.

No Other Species on the planet can do any of those!

Our Minds are Bombarded with 1000s of Advertising messages all day – every day and with the evolution of the internet and media, new expectations and standards have risen to RE-Define how we go through relationships and then to reach to what is called LOVE.

Love possesses nothing and does not want to be possessed, because it is enough in itself. It will make you grow, and then throw you on the ground. It will whip you so that you feel your impotence, it will shake you to rid you of all your impurities. It will crush you to leave you flexible.

And then it will toss you in the fire so that you can become the
blessed bread to be served at God’s sacred feast (The Prophet, by
Khalil Gibran [1883-1931])

Well the same applies to business life…

The notion of Mobile Worker is more common in companies for some employees than it was ever before; Flying from country to country for business have dramatically increased for even middle level employees;  and multi-tasking has rolled down from a specific segment of individuals to be the necessity in virtually any job nowadays.

All aspects of Business have changed, from recruitment to operations to planning… and how people interacts have changed too.

So the bottom line is that what was considered the exception back then has become the rule now and new exceptions are starting to rise.

But beneath all this CHANGE & Evolution, and what comes with them from Stress… Lies a Truth that never gets affected. the truth about the Balance.

Work Love Balance Book

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